Journal entry.

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Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

For everything there is a season,
    a time for every activity under heaven.
A time to be born and a time to die.
    A time to plant and a time to harvest.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
    A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
    A time to grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
    A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
    A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear and a time to mend.
    A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate.
    A time for war and a time for peace.

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I’ve never been more thankful for all these times in life. Each one brings a unique growth of their own. And without both the good and bad I wouldn’t learn to appreciate either. The tears make me that much more thankful for the laughter and the memories of laughter carries me through the tears. All of these are a gift from God. A gift I hope I always choose to embrace, good or bad. So that through every circumstance I might grow to be more like Jesus everyday.

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This has been a time of harvest for me personally. I’ve been writing more than ever, God even gave me a new book idea. Which I’m very excited about but also quite nervous because it’s definitely a controversial topic. (I don’t know why I’m surprised by that one, Jesus always talked about controversial things.) I’m discovering a lot about myself and really just growing in general. But this all truly started when I surrendered everything to God a week ago. (Boy, does He move quickly.)  I laid down all my hopes and dreams of what my life might look like. I laid down all my desires and ultimately my will for His. We swapped plans I suppose you could say. And when I did that I felt as if I could feel Him say, “Now we can truly get started.” I have absolutely no clue as to what my life will look like, I have no plan other than taking each day as it comes. But I know my Shepherd, He is good and has never been unfaithful to me before. And I don’t follow Him out of shame or guilt, but out of love. He came to me when I was lost and dirty. He didn’t chastise me. He cleaned me, embraced me and took me under His wing. He wants to do the same for you too. Our part is simply to surrender to it.

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